Microsoft’s Bizarro Universe: 8 years late; in garish color; featuring inferior products (w/ video)

In a variation of a scene we’ve seen 275 times before, Microsoft has recreated an Apple Retail Store grand opening in such a way that only a serial copier could love. It’s the ultimate “Me Too” statement.

As if Windows and the Zune didn’t do enough to stamp Microsoft as an pitiful Apple follower, welcome to the Microsoft Retail Store:

Direct link to video via YouTube here.

MacDailyNews Take: Shameless, sad, and more than a bit scary. In Microsoft’s Bizarro Universe, no one has ever been to an Apple Store or seen even one second of one of the tens of thousands of Apple Retail Store grand opening videos on YouTube, so when they see Microsoft’s “new” retail experience, they’ll think of Microsoft as such the innovator. Up in Redmond, they’re delusional to the nth degree. And a fish rots from the head down. (May Steve Ballmer remain Microsoft’s CEO for as long as it takes!) As usual, Microsoft follows Apple around like a brain-damaged three-legged puppy. Certainly no company, not even Palm, wishes they were Apple more than Microsoft. Ballmer ought to just rename the whole mess “Derivativesoft” and buy every billboard on the planet to proclaim: “All we do are half-assed Apple copies, suckers!” Seriously, who do they think they’re fooling?

We can hear the laughter from Cupertino and we’re in New York today.

As luck would have it, Apple’s 275th retail store’s grand opening took place in Cardiff (UK) today.

Here’s queue for Apple Store St David’s 2, Cardiff, UK Grand Opening:

Direct link to video via YouTube here.

Now those are lines. We’ll check back to see how the lines look for Microsoft’s 275th store if they ever get there. (smirk)

[Thanks to MacDailyNews Reader “iest” for the heads up.]

111 Comments

  1. Saw Ballmer on CBS. He said M$ has 9 out of 10 people as customers. Later on a blog he said 95%. I just hope people who buy those touch screen monitors enjoy cleaning. The fish bubbles are cute, how do they help get work done?

  2. The poor Moneysoft sheep drones walking into the slaughter house so mindless like as they cheer…

    oh joy… HP, Dell, Acer and Toshiba, and they’re clapping… Makes me happy to know the morons of the tech world got “Windows Shopping” so the apple stores are free of wasted space and intellectual dead weight.

  3. OMG, that M$ store is direct copy of Apple’s! Wouldn’t any other company in the world be *embarrassed* to be so blatantly ripping off another? I mean, the same glass front, same layout, same tables, even employees dressed the same wearing employee tags. Couldn’t they do *anything* different?

  4. cheering made sense on the iPhone 3GS launch and iPhone launch days because you were going to walk out of the store with the hottest, most advanced cellphone on the planet for which you queued a couple hours.

    just wait until their store is jammed full of people who are having upgrade problems. They just see apple retail dollar figures and forget there’s a reason they insulate themselves from the public. Just wait.

  5. Those people look like they were paid to stand in line at the Microsoft store as they all arrived 2 hours before the opening – It obviously was a set up they even had port-a-poties set up in the parking lot. WOW is right we will see how long the crowd lasts – every Apple store I go in is always packed.

  6. That was a really mean thing to say about brain-damaged three-legged puppies. Clearly, any such puppy has more to offer than a Microsoft store.

    Take it back, MDN! Take it back, I say!

  7. Unashamed rip off of the tables in the center of the store with equipment. The uniforms with different colors denoting different positions. Even the name tags hanging from the necks of the poor sales people who will be forced to sell second rate products. I can not wait until those screens that surround the store show the computer blue screen of death.

    The only things Microsoft can lay claim to is The Blue Screen of Death and the Red Circle of Death. I can not wait until the novelty wears off and people finally realize that the only difference between this and Best Buy are the selection. There is nothing you could see here that you wouldn’t find at your local WalMart.

  8. I just noticed that when comparing the two videos, the Apple store showed teh queue to the entrance–and its pretty damn long. Yet, on the MS video, they only showed the portion where they started cheering the patrons coming in. How come there is no video of the queue for the MS store….anyone, please, provide some clips.

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