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what a great idea.... i'm going to call Phil Schiller right now...


*ring*
Demo-boy!!!! oh Demo-boy!!! Please have all of my cards changed to S Jobs. Thanks Phil... see you in January doing a demo with me over iChat.

I love Schiller... mostly because his name is what he does. Isn't that funny?

Sounds like "J" and his homies in Redmond are trying to take the whole copying thing to another new level...

Zune, another original, 3rd rate product but the big copy right infringing company going. What more can they steal?

But shouldn't they have called it iZune? iHad one this morning.

That took long enough to post.

Wishing for cool doesn't make it so. I wished for a few million shares of AAPL - it didn't work. James is not cool, even if he changed his name to J. Sorry, try again.

J von Winskinheimer

As a device the Zune isn't bad. It's a bit larger, but it also feels more sturdy than an iPod. As a media player is just fine, in and of itself. It's the quagmire of a company that's backing it that makes it undesirable.

You can't even load music you previously purchased from MSN on the silly thing.

The nuty points system for purchasing music, and yet another proprietary DRM scheme for the love of god, is just plain stupid.

And I damn sure wouldn't buy one JUST BECAUSE MICROSOFT IS PAYING UNIVERSAL.

I don't think this stuff is the fault of Allard.

Once you leave the Zune itself, and get into the Microsoft world, all the "cool" vanishes and you become quickly aware that you're dealing with Microsoft again.

All you have to do is count the number of times you say, "huh?" as you're trying to work with the thing and it's software, and purchasing music, and you go running back to your happy, simple, one click - music purchased and loaded iPod.

Microsoft really needs to study iTunes more closely as well as the iPod.

This Allard guy is far too overrated in my book. Overlooking the Zune fiasco, it seems incredible that he actually gets credit for developing a gaming device which only now - 5 years after its creation - is actually starting to turning a profit. If it was any other company, one without the deep pockets that Microsoft has and are necessary to bear the cost of such a strategy, he would have been sh*tcanned a long time ago.

I don't think any of the executives (Gates, Ballmer, Allard, et.al.) at Microsoft could be cool even if you stored them in a freezer.

Allard is weird... Google image search him and he looks like the illigitimate stepson of Ballmer...

this guy tries to achieve something big over Apple. but there is limitation on creative mind. Jonathan Ive is originally interior designer before doing industrial designer. all his works are so much unique, inspired by art. J. Allard studied computer engineering. usually people, who study computer at school, have limited idea on creation. how dare you compare with Jonathan ive with this guy who never seems to be creative. I know he was making Xbox. see! what computer guy designed game console. I don't see any attraction on it. I don't buy it neither. Xbox hasn't really successful with billions of deficit. zune will be the same target next few years. game business Apple didn't jump to do. that's why MS can do something. Apple is different company. if you compete with this company with pure ability, nobody can beat. especially, media market like digital content. Apple has already accumulated tons of idea, know-how long time ago. MS tries something now. it's too late.

"Always the iconoclast, Allard works on an Apple G5 computer, next to an obviously less frequently used pc. Allard says it's important to learn about the competition.""

Yeah Im going to eat this entire box of donuts so I can get an idea of the wrong kinds of foods to eat before I go on my diet. Yeah. Thats it. Thats the ticket.

Bring me another box, im not sure yet.

Ha ha..I took my own advice and the third pic I looked at had this reader comment:

"On a side a note, every time I see J. Allard's picture, it fills me with the urge to kill. I think that if I ever met him, I would probably beat the crap out of him before he said a word. I'm sure he's a decent guy, he just has one of those faces."

http://www.joystiq.com/2006/02/06/j-allard-were-going-to-take-on-the-wikipedia-model/

I'm not alone.

If Microsoft actually copied, they'd have better products than they do now.

Unfortunately, what MS does is look at something that's successful and ask themselves what they can add to a product to make it more appealing. What they don't understand is that to make something people like, you should look at something you want to copy and ask yourself "what can we remove from this equation without destroying the user experience?"

Simpler is better. MS doesn't get that.

Copying isn't cool.

Let's not forget that the Zune isn't even an original product, much less a "cool" one. It's a re-hashed Toshiba design, is it not? Big whup!!!

Macaday,
I would have that guy's lunch money before first bell...

MW: Head, as in Allard gave at the office.

Steve Jobs: Hey, Jim, I heard you guys showed my video.

James Allard: We sure did and they’re still holding their groins and crying like little girls.

Steve Jobs: Well, that kick in the nads is gonna hurt a while.

James Allard: Yeah, I can’t believe it. I thought it would really motivate them instead.

Steve Jobs: No doubt about it, bro, you got their attention now. They’re not gonna forget that for a while. So, what are you gonna do for an encore?

James Allard: Oh, I don’t know. We gave them their towels back, Steve. That didn’t work. Ballmer did the monkey dance and that failed, too. We thought we could shame them into producing showing your video and that didn’t work either. We’ve been thinking about using a lottery for capital punishment when we fail to deliver. You know, produce or die.

Steve Jobs: Actually, I don’t know. I’d talk to legal if I were you, Jim, I doubt that executions are socially acceptable.

James Allard: What else can we do?

Steve Jobs: James, c’mon get real. You guys have our Macs, our OS, and you have our iPods. I think that Apple has given you plenty of material.

James Allard: But it’s not enough, you know that. Please, tell me, what’s Apple’s secret?

Steve Jobs: OK, alright, cool yer jets, dude. Just like my buds at Nike say, “Just do it.”

James Allard: Just do what? What’s it? I don’t understand.

Steve Jobs: Obviously. Look, we’re kinda busy over here, 2007 is just around the corner and we need to wrap up a few things for our people. Hey, I’ll call you later. Merry Christmas, Jim.

James Allard: Sure, OK. Thanks, you too.

(hangs up phone, pause)

James Allard (speaking to self): Do it! Do it. Do it? I don’t know.

James Allard: Mary, get me legal on line 2. I need to run a few things by them ASAP.

o god do i feel old now. this panty-waste with an initial is the same age as i am. and look how cool i can be - look ma, no caps!

i would definitely say that j allard is the personification of microsoft today - absolutely out of touch with reality. and it is sad, just sad. but what is truly pathetic is the mass of people who eat this up.

i asked my sister-n-law about the zune and the new tv commercial spots. (a little background, she just finished grad school in england - art history - and is a beatle-loving hippie wannabe with brains and attended quite a few concert fests over the years.) her reaction to the zune? (and she has 2 iPods) "what the hell? are these people serious? what a load of crap. it just stinks fake."

wow. pretty much says it all people.

They need to offer a course in "cool" at the leading business schools.

...

curious, is there any software product that Microsoft sells, that they concieved, created, and sell on their own? I can't think of one:
windows,
frontpage,
basic?
word
powerpoint
excel
.....

If you read the article, you'll see that Allard claims credit for writing a program called Lemonade Stand in 1981, when he was 12.

"If I had half a brain, I would have waited 10 years, called it Sim Lemonade and made a bazillion," Allard jokes in the article.

As I understand it, this program was shipping on Apple II computers as far back as 1979, and was actually written earlier by the Minnesota Educational Computing Consortium (MECC).

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lemonade_Stand

Apparently, this guy even borrows his childhood accomplishments from others.

Calpundit, good find.

They need to offer a course in "cool" at the leading business schools.

...

Bad idea. The graduation rate would drop like a stone.

Just again asked of my oldest (10th grade, in a major metropolitan high school with over 4,000 students): "So what are kids saying about the zune?" Her answer" "I haven't heard anything."

To her knowledge, almost no one knows about the zune; many many have an iPod.

BTW in the meantime (since the zune's release) she has checked them out (online and at Best Buy), and her reaction was similar to the one above.


Disclaimer: she owns and loves her original 1st Generation iPod (purchased with babysitting $$).

Lemme get this straight: changing your name to match your e-mail address is "freaking cool"???

I would change my name to matchmy e-mail


Signed Mustafa Crap

Hey Calpundit, isn't this idiot also trying to copy the look of Michael Stipe...the lead singer from REM...and doing a bad job with the glasses?

http://www.joystiq.com/2006/02/06/j-allard-were-going-to-take-on-the-wikipedia-model/

http://www.beliefnet.com/story/187/story_18748_1.html

Microsoft’s Steve Jobs-wannabe J Allard has 9 iPods and uses an Apple Mac

What happened to companies that fired employees for using competitor's wares? Doesn't MS have the confidence to use their own products?

Next we'll find out Bill Ford drives a Toyota. Unbelievable.

It's sad when MS has to rally their troops with ten-plus year old "fighting words".

It's even sadder when MS can't motivate from inside. What, no "Developers!" video?

MS is in long-term decline and they know it; they're living off legacy. When the Office cash cow goes try (or they nearly kill it like they're doing with Windows), it's game over. MS has a very serious lack of a credible Plan B.

Watching MS squirm, seethe, and generally go crazy while Apple & Google charge into the future is a sight to behold.

Allard's boss gave him a crystal with a picture of Steve Jobs in it for his 15 year anniversary? Wow, that's truly bizarre. The guy sounds like a real putz.

I think MS tried to design the Zune to be a music player for all those who don't have one.

"Zune: the iPod for the rest of you."

Buster: LOL! Michael Stipe meets Devo!

"Zune: the iPod for the rest of you."

Actually, its more like:

"Zune: the iPod for those who don't know any better."

I prefer the old Allard--pudgy, passionate, geeky and even jovial.

Microsoft marketing has sucked the life out of the poor bastard.

About not getting it and trying to copy, Microsoft is a classic cargo cult. Google "cargo cult" and read about it. I'm sure you'll say, " Oh yeah, that's Microsoft all right."

Well, if Zune fails, whose head[s] should roll?

Come on now... Does one of the top Microsoft executives REALLY have 9 iPods and a PowerPC-based Mac in his office? The new Microsoft indeed. The old Microsoft would have confiscated all iPods from its employees and replaced them with Zunes. Even the Mac Business Unit folks would have been forced to use Zunes. One wonder Microsoft is a basket case. The employees (from the top down) don't believe in their own products.

J Allard before and after his style make-over by Microsoft PR team: before fatty geek with male pattern baldness, after slim shaved-head 'dude'.

How cynical is this?

http://www.geekonstun.com/mt/archives/hd_allard_050605.html

Oh yes, and changed his names from "James" to "J" at the same time too.

Although some people say that it's to match his Microsoft email address of

I created this blog entry that I think says it all:

http://bitteroldbastards.com/node/43

I hope Phil doesn't change his first name, that reminds me I have to go take a Zune.

That picture of "j" reminds me of when Al Gore wore a plaid shirt on the campaign trail, tucked in with pleated jeans. In High School we called these people POSERS. Definitely NOT cool.

As far as the video goes, it just beat the employees down more. Here Microsoft is repackaging a Toshiba Gigabeat and all 230 employees know it, then Allard rubs it in by showing this video of Jobs talking about how unoriginal Microsoft is. He has already forced them to repackage someone else's player and copy everyting else from Apple and 4 weeks before the roll-out he asks them to be more creative!? How motivating!

microsoft has no culture. nothing says culture like mock turtlenecks 365 days a year.

that: "J Allard before and after his style make-over by Microsoft PR team: before fatty geek with male pattern baldness, after slim shaved-head 'dude'." is just pathetic. Anybody that actually falls for this crap deserves to be stuck with a Zune.